Funny One Liner Jokes Collection

Here are some funny one liner jokes for you :

• Butter or jam put on bread, a married man is half dead.
• Sing like a Koel and live like a king. Take a proper bath, let the phone ring!
• One two three, a big old tree. Four five six, lice in hair pricks. Eight nine ten, I missed the train.
• I love you sweetheart, I wish you had a brain as big as heart.
• Grass is green and roses are red. Lets stop talking nonsense and go to bed!
• A glass full of  lime soda with a little ice. Lets fix a trap for all the household mice!
• You make my day nice and bright. You put my impression on my boss right. I can’t live without you – my shoe polish!
• I have 10 fingers, 2 hands, 2 legs, 2 ears, 1 nose but brain is absent!
• You give me 1 dollar and I give you 1 rupee. I have a standard unit system, I don’t believe in currency valuations you see!
• When your wife, screams at you.. be patient to listen and say I love you.. When your wife bangs the door at you, be courteous and say I love you.. When your wife starts beating you, bear the beat and say my heart beats for you..
• When in a marriage there are no wars, then you both are lucky stars!
• Marriage is an art, the art of getting trained to maintain peace in the extreme circumstances while living with the biggest enemy!
• Live life king size, have a burger and have french fries!
• Where there is a will, there is a way. Life is a small hill, with monkeys all the way!
• Have faith in yourself and have faith in others. These sentences do sound old, but are true in all weathers!

 Hope you enjoyed reading them! Do post feedback and comments.